Just Let It Go

Devotional for Thursday the 14th

The movie “Why Did I Get Married?” is humorous, real and very poignant. Even without seeing the movie just two of us could come up with all sorts of funny and not so funny marriage tidbits that might have any of us asking ourselves that same question.

Side note: I have been using the word poignant a lot lately, so I thought for both my sake and yours I would double check it’s meaning: the first definition is ‘pungently pervasive’ as in a strong smelling perfume. The second meaning is: painfully affecting the feelings, deeply affecting, touching. That’s the one I mean!

Even in my most loving relationships things are said or happen that deeply and painfully affect feelings. Whether or not something is intentional isn’t even the point. I deeply care how other people feel, and when I hear that I have caused pain in any way, I am overwhelmed with grief and disappointment with myself. I want to accept that hurt will happen both by me and to me; I know everything will be so much easier. So, how do I get and keep myself in emotional shape to not take everything personally? How can I learn to ‘just let it go’ as so many well-meaning people encourage me?

First, there is the intentional factor. There is no way I can be perfect! Let me repeat this so it really gets to my heart. There is no way I have done anything perfectly. But as a child of God I have the assurance that He is with me. What I cannot be on my own, He can use my willingness to let Him work through me to His glory. To His glory simply means that He gets the credit for anything well done or accomplished on my part. Let me be clear, I would rather not apologize and allow God to use it for healing a relational break. I would rather not admit that something that should be petty bothered me; even if God will use it to strengthen my character. Yet when I am humble and gently honest, God uses the one thing to achieve many things.

Second, the truth is I am not totally free of the desire to be popular and liked. So when a friend lets me know that something hurt her, I am not only crushed that I caused her pain, but then my heart sinks into a pit of rejection and worry that she will never love me again, or at least, not the same as before. This pattern screams selfishness and it’s all about me and how I feel. As I write all this out I realize that I still have so much of me to let go of, and so much room left to allow God to fill with His spirit. The Joyce Meyer’s book “Approval Addiction” defines and identifies the pattern of depending on other’s opinions.

How am I going to just let it go? I will start letting go of expectations of myself and others. The goal is not to be perfect but mature. I will start writing down on note cards what God’s word has to say, and read them over and over until my heart starts to truly believe. I will pray and thank God that He is not finished with me yet and is patiently leading me in the way I should go.

Hebrews 12:4

In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don't feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children? My dear child, don't shrug off God's discipline, but don't be crushed by it either. It's the child he loves that he disciplines; the child he embraces, he also corrects. God is educating you; that's why you must never drop out. He's treating you as dear children. This trouble you're in isn't punishment; it's training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God's training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God's holy best. At the time, discipline isn't much fun. It always feels like it's going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God. (The Message)

Bottom line: I am not perfect and it is not all about me. God has me covered and He’s taking care of everyone else.

Find out more about “Approval Addiction” and Joyce Meyers’ ministry at www.joycemeyers.org. Many of her books are available at the public library.

Written by Mary M. Wilkins