It is Not Just What You Say....Monday

8/3/15

"I'm sorry," I slowly drawled out each syllable. My brother eyed me suspiciously. We both knew I didn't mean it. I was just following the letter of my mother's law, but my heart wasn't in it. Actually nothing about me was in it. I was already hardening my heart and looking for an opportunity to get him back.

When my mother caught me apologizing in said manner, she would stand up straight and make me look her in the eye. As she looked into my soul, she declared, "It's not just what you say, but how you say it."

My brother and I finally made peace, and eventually became very good friends. But I have learned the hard way that I do not always have a chance to make up for the words I use or the way I use them. 

Words kill, words give life;

they're either poison or fruit--you choose.

Proverbs 8:21 MSG

Some people make cutting remarks,

but the words of the wise bring healing.

Proverbs 12:18 NLT

Through the years I have lost friendships, job opportunities, good opinions of others, and self-respect. Regret for the pain I caused others and the grief I brought on myself has taught me to weigh my words, and my tone, very carefully. I am not perfect, and sometimes still cause pain when I open my mouth. But I am confident that God is faithful to finish the work He has begun in me (see Philippians 1:6). Now when I fail, I speak up quickly to apologize for my words, my tone, or both.

Same words said a different way.

Dear Lord, please give each of us eyes and ears to recognize how our words and our tone are affecting those around us. Please give us the humility to admit when we are out of line, and the strength to listen more than we speak. May we choose words that are like fruit instead of poison. In Jesus name, amen.

Written by Mary M. Wilkins