It’s Not you…It’s Me

Devotional for 10/29/11

Have you ever taken offense for someone else? What I mean is taking on an unnecessary offense. Of course we should rise up and defend the defenseless, and no doubt that's a characteristic that God programmed into us, but that innate quality seems to pop up even when the victim is perfectly capable of processing and dealing with the offense on their own.

I suppose along with everything else, this needs to be brought under control. It's appropriate to become offended and take action when our young child is being bullied at school, but not OK when it's our adult child being taken advantage of at work. I know others have taken on my offenses, and likewise, I've done the same thing with others. Recently I found myself taking on an offense that rightly belonged to God, and I'm still struggling to know how to process it.

I was completely taken off guard. I thought I knew exactly how to handle these things. After all, I've led Bible Studies in the past that dwindled down to practically nobody. I knew better than to let it get me down. I knew they were allowing things to get in the way of where God wanted them to be, and the best thing to do was to pray. It was a perfectly right and healthy way of looking at it. So, why is it that this time when it happened, I allowed myself to become hurt?

It's true that over the years, my mindset on the matter could have been negatively colored by experience. I suppose that's what contributed to certain phrases that were running through my mind like, "If I have God's blessing, it will be a success," and, "I must have not truly sought the Lord when I chose this study," and then finally my spirit was beaten down and I succumbed to, "This has happened so many times, it must be me." And that's when God brought Samuel to my mind.

Samuel and his sons were the last judges of Israel. He loved God and devoted his life to serving God and God's people. In his day, there were no kings because God was their king. A judge was a leader of the people. He did not control the people. God spoke through him. He worked and lived right alongside the people. He was a prophet, not a king. It was during Samuel's lifetime that the people began to demand a new kind of government. They wanted a king like the other nations had, and Samuel became offended. Samuel took his offense to God, and God's response was, "It's not you, it's Me." When I read this, it occurred to me that that's exactly what God said to me when He brought Samuel to my mind. In fact, I think I might have more in common with Samuel than I thought.

Like Samuel, I have a heart for God and His Word. Like Samuel, I'm a facilitator, working right alongside the ladies in my group doing my study. And like Samuel, I had taken on God's offense. Now although, I realize that God was rejected, not me, the truth is I was affected by it just like Samuel was. OK, so there was pain involved, but it's the cost of putting myself in a position of serving God and others. Samuel was told plain and clear that he was experiencing the pain that God experiences.

There's nothing wrong, or should I say, inappropriate about feeling the pain of someone else's offense. It causes us to examine ourselves to see if we are causing pain to others. That's definitely something I should be checking in myself on a regular basis...specifically whether or not I am causing God any pain. By the way, experiencing God's pain is something we're told will occur. Usually we see it in the form of persecution from unbelievers. I guess I shouldn't be surprised if sometimes the pain comes from our own brothers and sisters in Christ. I should still consider all joy, right?

We do cross the line, however, when we respond to that pain sinfully. What's important to me is that Samuel did not give up serving God. He did not run away from his calling because of the pain he felt. Even after Israel's government took on a whole new look, Samuel continued to serve and obey God. He was the same person that he always was to Israel. His role as spiritual leader never changed. He was respected by the people, because he was never rejected by them...God was.

God wants me to realize this. He wants it to sink down deep, and for me to not respond sinfully. He allowed me to experience His pain for a purpose...maybe to examine myself...maybe to bring me closer to Him...maybe both. What I do know is that it has led me to pray more for the ladies of my study, which is far from a sinful response. I also know that regardless of the experience, I will not give up my passion to serve God and others.

Amie Spruiell 10/28/2011