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1/23/13

Devotional for 1/24/13


A Nail Biter

I don’t know when I started biting my nails. My mother says it was practically from the beginning. If any nail had a chance to grow a little white edge, it was soon nibbled off. Any pressure, positive or negative, would soon have me searching my fingertips for something to chew on.

Fast forward more than 20 years and I did stop biting my nails (mostly). But another decade or two later I have found that when something is “Worrying me” I start to nibble again. Of course, I have a little psychological trick I play. I just nibble an uneven nail, or a broken nail, or the hang nails that develop on my thumbs. It is so ingrained in me, that I rarely notice what I am doing.

When my husband asks me what is bothering me, and I quickly reassure him “Nothing.” I am startled when he then asks, “Why are you chewing on the sides of your thumbs?” Huh, it’s like I’ve been exposed. Even I can’t deny that something must be up or I wouldn’t be chewing away on every bit of skin or uneven nail available to me.

So, when I sat down to write this devotional my husband suggested I share what I am worried about as he glanced significantly at my red and tattered thumbs.  I knew he was on to something. I am worried about many things, just like Martha! (see Luke 10:41) Children, young and grown; finances; my relationship with my husband; friendships; spirituality, am I growing in the knowledge of His Word? Am I being faithful to Him? Ha! I just caught myself, “trimming another nail with my teeth!” This is so real it’s funny!
 
What is my issue, after all? I am afraid. I am afraid that God, the same God who has watched over me and covered me and preserved me in the past will all of a sudden decide He will only do so much for me. It sounds silly as I write it, but truly what is the root of my fear?  It is doubt that I deserve for God to handle this.



For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control.

2 Timothy 1:7 Amplified

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Philippians 4:67 The Message

Dear Lord, thank You for Your patience in reminding me I can let go and I can trust You. I truly do want to lay down my fears and accept with confidence Your promises. So be it.

Written by Mary M. Wilkins

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