5/12/14
I saw the new movie, "Mom's Night Out," which was very enjoyable, I recommend having a friend with you to share the laughter. One of the mom's explains to her teenage daughter that she is being strict with her to protect her from..."Making the mistakes she had made."
Of course, it's what many of us want, for our kid's to benefit from our own errors by learning from them second hand. I want to spare my adult children the pain, grief, regret, and sorrow I knew firsthand; so I warn, and advise, and direct, and lecture, and nag, and nag, and nag.
I always told myself I wouldn't do this. I would be like my wiser and older friends. I would offer advice once, and then step back and allow them the growing opportunity to make their own decisions and to learn from them. Whether their decision has positive or negative results, it's a personal lesson for them. Because no matter how I feel, it's about them, and not me.
Dear Lord, thank you for reminding me that I can't/shouldn't rescue my adult children from their decisions. Please help me to remember where I end and they begin. Please help me to respect their right to be themselves. I know that the greatest thing we can do for anyone is to pray. Please help me to remember to pray, instead of worrying. Please help me to pray, instead of lecturing. Please help me to accept the outcome, even if it's not something I like. Because, just like in my own life, where You turned my ashes into beauty, my mourning into gladness, You will do the same for them. In Jesus name, amen.
Written by Mary M. Wilkins
I saw the new movie, "Mom's Night Out," which was very enjoyable, I recommend having a friend with you to share the laughter. One of the mom's explains to her teenage daughter that she is being strict with her to protect her from..."Making the mistakes she had made."
Of course, it's what many of us want, for our kid's to benefit from our own errors by learning from them second hand. I want to spare my adult children the pain, grief, regret, and sorrow I knew firsthand; so I warn, and advise, and direct, and lecture, and nag, and nag, and nag.
I always told myself I wouldn't do this. I would be like my wiser and older friends. I would offer advice once, and then step back and allow them the growing opportunity to make their own decisions and to learn from them. Whether their decision has positive or negative results, it's a personal lesson for them. Because no matter how I feel, it's about them, and not me.
"Don't worry about anything;
instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need,
and thank him for all he has done
Philippians 4:6 NLT
Dear Lord, thank you for reminding me that I can't/shouldn't rescue my adult children from their decisions. Please help me to remember where I end and they begin. Please help me to respect their right to be themselves. I know that the greatest thing we can do for anyone is to pray. Please help me to remember to pray, instead of worrying. Please help me to pray, instead of lecturing. Please help me to accept the outcome, even if it's not something I like. Because, just like in my own life, where You turned my ashes into beauty, my mourning into gladness, You will do the same for them. In Jesus name, amen.
Written by Mary M. Wilkins
This is a very important topic. Mom's first impulse is to jump in and save. I like your words asking to "remember where I end and they begin." For a parent it is acceptable to give an opinion but the next move is to give our children to God. Trust Him after you do that.
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Thank you for sharing. While my children are not "adult" yet, I know someday they will be completely independent of us. I pray for wisdom and guidance each day to be equipped to teach them well and model to them a heart that seeks the Lord first.
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