The Heavy Load

I heard someone say, “It makes you wonder, ‘Just how heavy was the cross?’” She said this in response to hearing of the heavy load some of us must carry. I remember it was 8 years ago about this time of the year. She was referring to my niece, my brother-in-law, and his wife.

As for me, my children are healthy. They’ve never suffered abuse or trauma. They have a mother and a father who love them. Some may see us and say that our burden is light, yet still every day I must ask Jesus to take my burden and give me His yoke.

Even without extra hardship, taking care of a family is a heavy load. I have 4 children; one adult daughter living at home and 3 boys, a teenager, a preteen and one who is still a little one. I realize that over the years there are few days that have gone by with no tears being shed on my part.

I believe that parenting is one of the most unselfish acts. It is losing your life willingly for the sake of others who need you. They’ve all been challenging children in their own ways, some more than others and they seem to rotate days so that there is never a break. On my own, my limits don’t stretch very far. Very often the devil will speak lies to me, “All of your hard work isn’t even putting a dent in the job. He’s never going to learn. It’s hopeless. You didn’t bargain for this.” Although I wish I never had to go through the battle of these lies, I have learned how to counter them with the truth, reminding myself that God thinks highly of me to take on this important job.

I remember asking Him to show me an example of a strong willed individual who was used specifically because of that personality God put into him. He showed me Paul, my brother-in-law. He’s the one my middle boy takes after and so he surely was the perfect example.

Ornery, unruly, and stubborn throughout his life, Paul fathered a baby girl at a young age. Now when that precious life was created, God must have looked forward into time and saw what that child was going to have to suffer through. He no doubt wept for that baby girl, Lacy, but knew that one day strong willed Paul would step in and take charge.

Paul was not allowed to be a part of little Lacy’s life for many years. This was due to the dysfunctional decision’s Lacy’s mother and family made. But Paul, against his own personality patiently waited and loved her from a distance with letters and gifts and no doubt prayers. So, almost 13 years after her birth, when she walked into a room to find her mother’s lifeless body was no longer able to withstand the poison she abused regularly, a strong willed grown man was called upon to travel the distance and rescue Lacy. Paul would not let anyone stop him anymore from removing his daughter from this family. He brought her into his home, where Lacy was welcomed by a new family…one that would not expose her to those evils anymore.

For such a time as this, Paul was prepared to step in and take God’s lead. I think of the heavy load his mother once had, but look at the man he had become. I think of the load I have had as well as so many of us do. At the time, I thought of my sister-in-law and the load she had of helping a teenage girl put pieces back together. It is an honor to be the one to train a child to allow his own will to come alongside God’s. It’s a heavy load, but an honor. And it makes you wonder, “Just how heavy was the cross?”

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him,

who have been called according to His purpose.

Romans 8:28

Amie Spruiell
9/02/2011